recent headlines

Otherwise known as "club notes."

FATHER AND DAUGHTER LIVE LIKE ROYALTY IN FAMILY'S ABSENCE
Chef Papa prepared fish and potatoes for dinner guests Wednesday night--the affair declared a "great success" by J & J. After-dinner entertainment featured John Calvin's commentary on the Harmony of the Gospels. His explanation of the Mount of Transfiguration held the rapt attention of all present, and was recommended by all.

MISS FISHER VISITS DOCTOR IN EPIC-LENGTH BATTLE WITH SINUSITIS
"Don't talk to me, I'm drugged" she said in a recent interview. However, she has since then been sighted, alert and happy, in her workplace on 8th and Ramsey.

~FOUR WEEKS AND COUNTING~
Young people anticipate college this fall. "I'm looking forward to only working part time," said S---. Others agreed that classes would be a great change of pace, but admitted to some apprehension about going back to school.

ENID VBS HAILED "GREAT SUCCESS" BY LOCAL VOLUNTEERS

HEROIC ENDEAVORS TO COMPLETE BIOLOGY TEXT
young teenagers finish chapter under stiff deadlines. Twinkle Toes particularly enjoyed learning the definition of "carbohydrate." After researching a description of a nucleotide, however, she admitted that she "would rather be dancing."

LOCAL CHURCH DELVES INTO PURITAN AUTHOR
"The Bruised Reed," a book describing the mercy and compassion of Christ toward those weak in faith and under persecution, is being enjoyed by the SRP Church. (editor's note--READ THIS BOOK.) A review, with excerpts, will follow in next week's edition.